Ode To Hornsby Hospital

This is just a wee poem that I knocked together this morning for the folks at Hornsby Hospital. Enjoy.

There is a little hospital
A bit up the North Shore
A few stops after Pymble
Will take you to its door

As you walk across Palmerston
You see it shining bright
The Hornsby Emergency Department
With its patient-attracting red light

It’s occurred to me on night shift
That I might have crossed the line
When I suggest to my colleagues
“Let’s go turn off that sign!”

The new department is a wonder
However, it makes me laugh
Ten times the number of patients
And still the same number of staff

The staff I mention all work hard
They really do us proud
Nose up against the grindstone
Despite that sign drawing in a crowd

Morning, noon and night
Their commitment never tires
Even though Charles is down at Westfield
Handing out emergency flyers!

So we struggle on and on
While trying not to end up madder
Reduce the leg, get the BiPAP on
It’s me that needs a tube in my bladder

I haven’t yet mentioned ARTs
The Aggression Response Team
Jump on patients, inject the drugs
They really are quite a scene

And moving onto PEC
What exactly do they do?
Drinking coffee and gossiping
But that’s between me and you

Frequent fliers are also fun
But one really gets me annoyed
With all her overdosing antics
Let’s hear it for Joanne….

…But moving on swiftly
Some thoughts put a smile on my face
Night time nibbles, the nurses chat
And the occasional wheel chair race

So all in all I have to say
It’s a good year that I’ve had
To turn around and head back home
Actually makes me quite sad

Australia has been without a doubt
A great place to spend some time
But I’ve eaten far too many pies
And drunk way, WAY too much wine

And what about the weather
And to the sun I’ve never seen
When you all talk about the drought
I’ve not idea what you mean

Everyday is over cast
The hail makes quite a sound
The lightning streaks across the sky
And the thunder shakes the ground

So next time water is a problem
And the heat becomes a pain
Get me a first class ticket
And sure as hell I’ll bring the rain

Finally I extend an invite
You’ll all be welcome at mine
Thanks to everyone at Hornsby
The wee hospital up the North Shore Line.