Internet At Last!

Finally, after much waiting and waiting and more waiting, spending hours and hours a public internet cafes and spending decades on the phone to Optus to get the bloody modem working, we have at last got internet in the flat.

For those who Skype - time to catch up face to face. For those who don't - expect more blogging than ever before (except we are totally skint and the chances of us doing anything exciting in the next few weeks is highly unlikely).

Workman's Arse!

If you are a girl then ignore this post - that includes you Isla. This post is purely for the boys and if you girls read on and are offended by this then don't say I didn't warn you!!!

The other night I was on my way back from the hospital. I've been cycling to work and on this particular day I was working a 2pm till midnight shift so I was cycling down PAcific Highway at roughly 1am.

I only had about 3km to go till I got home when I reached the part of the road that crosses the Freeway (Motorway). They've been working on it everynight that I've cycled past and I've never really taken that much notice of it.

However, as I approached the junction the lights turned red and I had to stop. There were two workman next to me loading stuff into a big council-style lorry. Nothing out of the ordinary you might say. I hadn't really paid them that much attention until they started talking to each other in highpitched girlie voices.

I did a double take and realised that the two workmen were work-women! Not only were they girls, but they were young girls perhaps in their 20's. And to top it all off they were totally hot! I couldn't believe it. Girls doing manual labour by themselves in the middle of one of Sydney's main highways and looking fit at the same time. What is the word coming to?

Can you imagine what it would be like if they employed girls in Glasgow to do that sort of work???

Look, I told you girls not to read this post, and no I don't think girls in Glasgow are all ugly!!! I just think you wouldn't get attractive ones doing motorway maintenance. If you are attractive and you want to do some roadside manual labour on the M8 then please prove me wrong!

Matt-Sloth

Awesome!!! Can you say "Baby Ruth"???

Shout out!

Just a wee note to Tash...

...Keep on Blogging - gives me some fun stuff to read on my days off. Cracking!

Toilet Humour!

I don't know if any of you out there will find this funny, but in the blurry haze of getting up at 6am to go swimming I noticed that our toilet is made by a company called Fowler. That cracked me up. At least I'll remember to foul in the Fowler (and, yes Adam and Ross, I know that all poo goes in the toilet!!!).

Sky-writing

Was walking through the town the other day and noticed some dude in a stunt plane writing stuff in the sky. Took me a while to realise what he was trying to spell but there is a new game show starting on one of the TV channels here and it's called the Rich List so I think it must have been an advert for that.

Australia Day

Not really sure what was being celebrated but we had a good time anyway. There was lots of bands and ice-cream and flags and stalls. However, distinct lack or beer and drunks. Bit like the west end festival but with no wasted neds.

As the picture below shows, the Aussies were right into it. But the whole thing seemed to be a bit pointless. I mean it's great having a public holiday but can you imagine "Scotland Day"? What would be the point of that?

Oor Hoose

This is a view from the train station looking up to our building. We are the third balcony up on the left side of the building so if any of you punters decided to visit at least you'll know which flat it is.

As a precaution though, I brought my Saltire which I'll hang off the balcomy football hooligan stylee so you can't miss us!

Arachnids

Saw this bad boy in someones garden the other day when we were walking back from Paddington Market. Qudos to Isla who was the one who spotted him and yet didn't jump out of her skin (and she's managed to kill 2 spiders in the flat so far!).

King's Cross

I really don't know why people rave about this part of town. It's a total dive. There are junkies KO'd in the street and people mainlining in plain sight! Everyone's pished by about 11am and there's rubbish and urine everywhere and the train station smells of sick.

Man it made me feel like I was back home in Glasgow!

Nads!

Sydney is not entirely free from vandals but this little effort at the station outside the flat made me laugh so I thought I'd share it with you.

Photo shop action

I'm pish at photoshop stuff but I thought I'd give the merging software a wee shot. This was put together with 6 pictures and it's worked out quite well. However, I realise that everything is so far away that you probably can't make out what it is. Took them on the ferry to Manly and just before we arrived I realised that I probably could have just taken one photo from further away and cropped it to this size. D'oh!

365 Challenge update

Dunno if any of you are reading the 365 but I've not posted on it for a while as I prefer not to write it on a public computer.

None-the-less, I have been keeping it up to date and I'm on 32 now. They're on the laptop waiting for us to "Get the net" as Wayne says.

Tan-tastic

It's a shame that such nice weather is spoilt by the fact that there in no ozone here!

There are so many adverts on TV and bill-boards pretty much saying "The sun is your enemy and will disfigure of kill you if you come out the shade!" I'm getting so pertified that I'm thinking of asking to work nothing but night shift so I don't ever have to be outside when the sun is up.

I'm sure I saw somewhere that the government was sponsoring a competition with big prize money for the first person to come up with a fire extiguisher large enough to put out the sun!

Spa ha ha

I guess this is the Aussie word for a Jacuzzi and we have one!

I've been using it every morning after my swim and it's awesome. Massive and totally relaxing. That said, I seem to be the only one that's using the pool and the spa. I've only seen one other person in there since I started swimming.

Not that I'm bothered but it seems to be a bit of a waste to pay for a flat with these facilities and not use them. I suppose it's not really a novelty for the people here. There's also a decent gym and considering the cost of joining an independent gym here I can't believe nobody is using it.

Suits me though.

"Anusol's What You Need!"

On a cycle from John O'Groats to Glasgow many years ago, I broke my backside. By Aviemore I couldn't sit in the saddle and was having to pedal for miles standing up. We stopped in a Pharmacy and I asked from some pain killers but the bloke in the shop suggested that I slap haemhorroid cream on my "ring of fire" as Pete decided to call it (infact he sang that song for the next 30 miles!).

Anyway, bought a racer yesterday and took it for a test run this morning at 6am. Did about 25 miles and took a trip up to the hospital where I start work on Monday to see if it will be a feasible commute.

Firstly, it's up hill the ENTIRE way! At one point I ran out of gears on a really steep section and was cursing all the Domino's I've ever eaten. Made it up though but almost stalled a few times which isn't good especilly if you are using clip in shoes and pedals which you don't know how to work and you are fixed to the bike with no hope of being able to let go!

It took about 55 mins to get there but the way home was ace (apart from the 3 lanes of mental Aussie drivers heading into the city). At one point I was cruising at 55km/h without even trying. So much easier than a moontain bike.

However, as the title suggests, it's been a few months since I was last on a bike and I now feel like... well lets just say I'm a bit tender. Sure it will get easier once I develop some butt-callouses.

Papa Roach!

As I mentioned earlier, there is plenty of wildlife here in Australia and given a single thread of a chance, most of it will occupy your flat in a matter of seconds.

Within 2 hours of moving into the flat and eating a pizza, there was already a trail of ants leading into the kitchen from the balcony. I've also seen roaches in the bins downstairs on every street I've walked on (those ones are mostly squashed though).

So the battle of the insects had begun. Their losing though, as I went straight to the supermarket and bought some insect spray "specially designed for crawling insects" and sealed the whole flat with it.

Ha ha we are impenetrable to invading insect forces and I've not seen an ant since. I bet Johnny Rico wishes he had some of that stuff during "Starship Toopers". Would have made life easy for him!

Crow me a River

Do you have foxes living near you?

Chances are that you do but have you ever heard them early in the morning when they are... well I don't really know what to call it? It's not a bark and it's not a howl. It's a bit of a combination... A Bowel I suppose. It certainly sounds like an animal having it's bowels ripped out.

Anyway, there is a worse sound than that. It's the noise that the crows make here. It's like babies being melted or something equally horrible. The first time I heard it was one morning outside the flat window and I thought someone was throwing cats onto the train tracks outside while the 6:20amd to Hornsby was passing! How can birds make such a stomach-churning sound? I've no idea!

The Really Wild Show

I remember Terry Nutkins (what a stupid name) and his team doing their best to get kids of all ages into wildlife. I used to love those kind of shows and as well as being a member of the Yong Orthitholgist Club as a child, I'm sure I'm right up their for the award of David Attenborough's biggest fan.

Anyway, the point I'm making is that I love all that nature stuff and sometimes I wish I'd taken my second year Zoology class a bit further and gone on to study animals as a career instead of this medicine malarky.

So that's me - I love the Blue Planet, World of Mammals, Life in the Undergrowth, Wildlife on One, Wildlife on Two and even those idiots on the REally Wild Show.

Isla doesn't!

We were in a book shop in one of the many malls and I suggested that she look at a book of Australian predators to try and let her make more of an informed decision regarding her fear of spiders. What a mistake.

She turned white and after leafing through a couple of pages she left the shop saying that she felt physically sick. Whoops! Now she's paranoid that hordes of black house spiders are gonna come crawling through the window at night it we leave the window open. This isn't Indiana Jones you know!

Anyway, it's probably my fault so for what's it's worth "Sorry" and can we please leave the window open at night? It's 25C in the flat!

OZ TV...

... is pish!

Flat...Stat!

Well you might have heard that we've been struggling to get a flat here but at last we have found a place to call home for the next 12 monthhs. It's quite cool and reasonably large considering the rubbish we looked at here. Mind you it's still a mental price. You almost. need a bloody mortgage here to rent a flat. CrazY!

That said it's cool even though its empty as it was unfurnished. At one point all we had was a chair and a blow up bed, but slowly it's coming together.

I'll stick up some photos once we get internet in the flat and I can stop using these public "easy internet" stations which are doing a good job of lining Stavros' pockets.

Bloody Opera House!

I swear I'm not doing it on purpose but that damn building is finding it's way into almost all my pictures. I think I've taken about 20 of it already. All I can say is thank goodness for digital cameras or else the bill for developing all these pointless snaps would be in the hundreds.

Sydney Visuals

What a sight. This is what greeted us when we came out of the cinema the other night. You wouldn't get this coming out of the Springfield Quay or UGC.

I guess it's because we are new to the area but every second there is something new to see or do or just appreciate. Absolutely awesome (so was the ice-cream we were eating - macadamia nut flavour!). You all must get your behinds over here and see some of this! The blog just doesn't do this trip justice.

Paddy's Market

There are loads of markets around Sydney but this is probably the most famous one. Consequently it is the busiest and the one where you are most likely to punch someone. It's also where I bought my anti-dandruff baseball cap!

It's a bit of a weird set up with the basement of this mall selling everything from handbags to capsicums. Speaking of veg, there is every kind you could possibly want here. It's also pretty cheap and I think that this place and markets like it lend themselves to you having a reasonably healthy diet. No deep fried mars bars here. Lots of meat pies though, although I'm not sure what "meat" they actually contains!

Not a cloud in the sky!

Well just one perhaps!

This what the weather has been like since we arrived. It's amazing and I'm sending a whole bunch of photons to you lot in sunny Glasgow where I'm sure the weather is up to it's usual rubbish.

I've been a stupid boy though because despite Isla's constant "put sun cream on!" and my constant "haven't I told you before that I don't burn?" I've ended up with sunburn and subsequent peeling in the worst of places! Well, the second worst; my scalp! I look like I've got psoriasis as I'm molting worse than the "before" picture in a Head and Shoulders Ad.

So, I've learnt my lesson and I bought a hat today but it's not to block out the rays but cover up the 'druff.

Thanks to deoderant, beer-fridges and farting cows I'm beginning to look like the dude that falls in the toxic waste near the end of Robocop.

Hornsby Hospital

Jumped on the train yesterday and went out to Hornsby to have a look at the area that I'll be working in for the next year.

Quite a nice shopping area next to the Station but they are a dime a dozen here. Even took the time to go and see a flat near by which was cheaper than the City and about 4 times the size of anything we had already seen. However, after looking around the place we realised that there is no soul there at all and it' too far from the centre of Sydney (incase Isla gets a job there). Outside of the Mall there is nothing but houses and no cafe or bar culture so we dingied it.

The hospital is about 15mins slow walk from the station and it seems... well quiet. I went into the ED to ask if they had changing facilities and showers in case I decide to cycle to work and there was only one person in the waiting room (and he seemed to be waiting on someone). Can you say "De-Skilled".

I'll see how things go and I know some of you might think that having a cushy number for a year is sweet. Yes you are right, but I don't want to head back to the Royal in Glasgow and bust my pan in having been sedentary for a year. That would blow.

That said, if is does turn out to be too quiet then I think I'll be asking for a Transfer perhaps to Royal North Shore. Afterall, I need to learn something in the next 12 months.

WiFi (of WeeFee if you are French!)

Australia prides itself in being ahead of other countries when it comes to some techy things like wireless internet.

In downtown Sydney there is a place called the Rocks and it has free WiFi for EVERYONE! How cool is that. Well it would be cool if we could actually get onto it...

...Yesterday we spent the whole evening wondering from one part of the Rocks (and one coffee shop) to another (and another coffee shop) looking for somewhere to get connected. Sure enough the "Rocks Hotspot" comes up as an unsecure WiFi when you search for it but could we get on... of course not.

I don't really know what else we could have tried short of tying a coathanger to the laptops with the hope of getting a better signal. It's supposed to be available from Circular Quay to the Bridge. Aye Right. Ended up resorting to the $100 per second connection in the Hotel as the every other Net cafe had closed by that point. (Actually it's $5 per 30 mins which is appauling).

Flat hunting in Oz

OMG - this is awful! Will explain fully in the 365 blog but in the interim this is how we feel...

Dinner With Laura

Taking time away from being both tourists and flat hunters, we managed to meet up with Laura, Gid, Kag and Simon for dinner a couple of nights ago.

What a great night.

It took us a little while to co-ordinate our operations but eventually we found our way into Darlinghurst and the restaurant where everyone was meeting. It was called Cafe Fellini and was on Victoria Rd (which I think is symonymous with restaurants). The crack was great and it felt like we hadn't even left home.

Most places here let you do BYOB and there was a convieniently located wine shop across the road so we grabbed a bottle of the most amazing Merlot (by a company called Nightingale Wines) and sank it rapidly with our bruchetta. The other couples did likewise. Isla and Kag struck up a bit of a work relationship and Kag teaches English and said the place she works are looking for teachers (Isla already has her TEFL certification!) so thumbs up on the financial/job front.

The meal was great - but slow, and Gid had a go at the waiter about the service which was amusing to watch but totally appropriate.

After that we went for cocktails (which was actually singular) and then boosted home after a thoroughly enjoyable evening. Good food, good company, good crack.

One for Matt!

Hey Matt! We've arranged to meet Laura for drinks this weekend and just after I got her text we walked past this building. How cool is that. The Berkeley has are own building named after her. I bet that girl could fall in shit and would come out smelling like roses! Anyway, I'll let you know how the weekend pans out.

Anyone for Cricket?

These Aussies are mad for their cricket, especially since they've just had a grand slam victory in the Ashes yesterday. Unfortunately, this madness is reflected in everything for example... If you were to watch Australian Sky News today you would get about 5 mins of news per hour and 55 mins of chat about Shane Warne and his team mates beating England and how they are now all retiring.

Actually what is awesome is that they are calling it "The Thrashes" which rules. Poor old England losing 5 - 0!!! Anyway this photo was taken on a Friday morning at the Rocks where people (who were probably skiving from work) were all sitting in the park watching the Tests on the big screen that had been set up for them. They definitely know how to relax here.

Sydney Rocks

We've been wondering about Sydney today and it really feels like a good place to live. There are a few mentalists running about and the odd drunk but nothing like Partick. This picture was taken at The Rocks (obviously) which is a really nice bit of the centre near the opera house. It also has the great benefit of having completely free wireless internet for everyone. The sun is shining and there are no clouds and it's just amazing to be here.

Tomorrow we got flat hunting but today we are tourists.

Goodbye to Singapore

Well it's almost time to leave Singapore. I'm about to head to bed and then we are leaving for Oz tomorrow. Today we filled in a few blanks on out Singapore check list and I think we mangaged to cover most of the things that were recommended here.

We got up early this morning and headed over to Sentosa Island. It was OK but a bit of a let down. It's billed as being Singapore's answer to Disneyland but in keeping with their respective locations, Sentosa is a quiet timid Asian to Disneylands shouting and screaming ubiquitous American.

It was quite good fun though and the cable ride was good as was the aquarium (where we petted the stingrays and it took all my restraint not to jump in the pool with them and visit my vengenge upon them for the untimely death of Steve Irwin).

After the aquarium we went along to the Dolphin Lagoon and watch the Pink Dolphin show which was OK but not a patch on Sea World on one of those big American jobs. They didn't really do any tricks and it was a bit like the Zoo in that the message was more "keep the environment clean" as opposed to "look what my dolphin can do" so I suppose that's alright.

When we got back to the hotel we went for a visit to the Spa but you can read all about that in the 365challenge. Then we went out for another banana leaf curry followed by some rubbish cheese cake and a disappointing display at supposedly "The largest fountain in the world". Aye right. One or two jets of water and a couple of lasers and a few bored punters doesn't really cut it.

Now to bed then Oz tomorrow.

Up to speed

Things here are great. If you've been keeping an eye on http://365skilz.blogspot.com then you'll see that we've been really busy in the last few days. There isn't a great deal of stuff to do at night here so it leaves plenty of time to blog (cyber-geek I know).

Anyway, today we are heading off to Sentosa which should be good fun and I'll let you all know how that goes later on tonight.

Suspicious man

So Isla and I decided to head out to Geylong Serai the other day which is this dodgey Malay part of town that's supposed to have all these brothels and prostitutes hanging around. There was also supposed to be loads of markets and stuff which is why Isla wanted to go. We went out there on the MRT and there really wasn't anything there just a couple of crappy stalls and we didn't see any brothels.

A piece of advice for anyone that is thinking of going out there... despite it being one of the recommended places to visit in the Rough Guide, if you are a white girl and you've got any boobs to speak of then STAY AWAY! I'm sure Isla wasn't that bothered but I spent the better part of an hour having hundreds of Asian men blatantly staring at Isla's chest. OK, so that happens to girls in Glasgow but it's no where near as obvious. These guys were walking within centimetres of us and gawping at her despite the fact I was standing right beside her (not that I'm jealous). Quite unnerving to say the least.

Anyway on the way back there was this rediculous video playing on the the MRT TV screens which was in the vein of a public security announcement. It was really badly acted out and the storyline went something like this...

"You need to look out for your safey and of those around you. Keep your eyes open for anything and anyone that looks suspicious. See that man? [Man enters train carrying bag] He looks suspicious and agitated. He's uncomfortable. What's in that bag? It looks heavy. What could be in that heavy bag? He's taking a seat. Keep an eye on him. He's avoiding eye-contact with everyone. Look, he's leaving the train and he's left his bag under the chair.

""Hey you've left your bag!" [shouts a lady] "Yes you've left your bag," [shouts a man]. "No, no it's not mine," [says Suspicious Man as he runs off train]."

"See he's disassociating himself from the bag. No don't go near it [as another man tries to pull it out from under the chair] it might be a bomb. Pull the emergency lever and get the MRT staff to call the police [as done by the lady]. You now know what to do."

What the hell is that all about!!! Talk about paranoia. This place is beginning to look more and more like 1984. Another great example of this was when we got off the train there was a poster that said, "If you are suffering from any illness then don't come into the city centre". Can you say Thought Control. Incidently, it's illegal to disagree with the Government here so I hope that cyberspace doesn't count!

Some photaes for ya

New Year

New Year was weird. It wasn't really what I'm used to. It started in the hotel room where Isla and I had a bottle of champagne and watched the world go by from out vantage point. Then we got ready and headed out. We weren't really sure what to expect but there was supposed to be a fire work display in the Bay behind our hotel so we wondered down to see it. We'd dressed quite smartly for the ocassion and stopped off in one of the local bars for some more champers (which at S$90 per bottle wasn't actually that bad given prices elsewhere).

After we left the bar we got carried along to the Bay with the crowd. It was odd that there was no pushing or shoving, no shouting and no violence. As I've said previously, a very ordered society this one. We were there by 10:30pm and without too much hassle managed to get right up to the front of the crowds. Nobody really seemed that bothered about being nudged out of the way so we got a great spot really quickly. However, everyone else was in shorts and t-shirts and it soon became apparent why. The heavens opened as is the way here, and within minutes we were soaked. There was a guy sitting next to us who seemed to be one of the organisers and I asked what time the fireworks were starting. He said "some at 11pm and some at midnight". Since we were already soaked we decided to stay at least until the 11pm fireworks. Unfortunately the photo above is the only fireworks that were set off. THAT'S IT! We waited for another 15mins but nothing. So we decided to head back to the hotel and get changed then watch them from our room.

Incidently, these lantern things were totally cool. It seemed that earlier on in the day people had been writing New Year wishes on these ballons which were then taken out and anchored in the Bay. It was quite a sight and certainly made up for the rubbishy 11pm fireworks. Anyway, back to the hotel. I got changed into my kilt (of course) and we headed into the atrium of the hotel and there was a live 20-piece band playing and some DJs and stuff. We didn't have tickets to join in (besides they were S$138 a piece) but we were still able to watch from one of the balconies dinking S$18 glasses of champagne. The partying went on until 2:30am but we were on the outskirts of this so it seemed a bit like we were crashing someone else's party. We had a reasonable time but we forgot to see the main fireworks at midnight which was a shame. I only hope they were better than the 11pm ones.

As I mentioned before, this NY seemed a bit weird. My memories usually involve hanging out with a big group of mates in Inverness or Stornoway or Dumfries (or working!!!) for a few days with lots of antics like surfing during a hail storm of diving over roaring bonfires and breaking of collar bones going on. This was nothing like that. It was totally subdued and seemed lacking somewhat. I know that Isla is not a fan of New Year but I have fond memories from this time of year and this is probably not one that I'll be that bothered about remembering (unfortunately I didn't have that much to drink so I suppose I will remember it). At least we weren't standing out in the pouring rain... oh, wait a minute... we were!

By the way I took this photo on the way back from the Bay as were walked through one of the malls. As you can see there is not a shred of litter, no piss, no vomit, no drunks and no bodies. People here really know how to have a party. Just kidding, but it does go to show you that you can have 50,000 people in one place watching an event at this time of year without all the badness that we, as Scots, expect to go with it. I suppose if the threat of being beheaded for littering was imposed on us then George Square might be a tad tidier.

China town

This was the view that greeted us as we came out the Chinatown MRT station yesterday. Fantastic. It was a great place. Lots of streets and lanes filled with people hawking their wares from narrow shop fronts. Quite spectacular. I particularly liked the way there was old men sitting drinking a cool bottles of Tiger beer at little tables on the pavement outside small cafe/bars seemingly without a care in the world.

The smells, sounds and colours were awesome and I'm sure we could have spent hours and hours wondering around the stalls. However, our stomachs were rumbling and I didn't think that the chicken beaks looked all that tasty so we went in search of some sushi at one of the malls back in the city centre.

Singapore Impressions

Hello everyone. This was the view from our bedroom window last night. Pretty sweet don't you think

Hope you all had a great xmas and a fantastic New Year. Singapore has been... interesting. We still have 2 more days here but as Sean said "You'll be bored after 3 days". I can see his point.

I don't want to sound like I'm not having a good time. It is a great place to visit but it does seem like a bit of a wasted trip as it's so similar to the UK that there isn't that many new things to do. If you have a look at the 365 challenge link you can see that so far we've only done 5 new things in 4 days which is a bit lame.

I guess most people come here for the shopping and there is a lot of that. Everywhere you look there are malls, malls, malls and as Isla says, they are a bit like casinos in Las Vegas - designed to get you in and prevent you finding your way out. The fact that they are air conditioned means you find yourself lured in even if you don't have a shopping agenda. Unfortunately if you are in the market to buy clothes and you have a shop size larger than a 6 or a waist larger than a 32" then you are screwed. Everyone here is tiny (in fact I feel like a giant for once!).

Other aspects that make you feel like you've not left home are things like the electrical supply which uses UK plugs so no need for adapters, the newspapers (yesterdays was called "The Sunday Times") and also a lot of the architechture is very British.

The food here is amazing though. As someone who loves his grub this has put a massive grin on my face. Yesterday we had the most sushi you've ever seen. It was in one of those restaurants with the all-you-can-eat conveyor belts that ran past your table. I felt like doing one of those cartoon things where the conveyor belt just ran into my mouth and I just kept eating and eating. However, we ordered from the menu instead! I think tonight we are going for Thai food. Mmm.